In my life...

This piece is something that is deeply personal for me. It is not the usual tirade of explicatives and rage fueled rants you have come to know. I struggled with the idea of even posting this, but I decided to say fuck it and go for it. You may not want to read about a different side of my personality, if not, stop reading this and fuck off… That is your prerogative.

The return of the "Ask an Asshole" columns!

As an asshole, I often am compelled to give unsolicited advice to people who couldn’t see reality it were attached to a 2x4 that hit them square in the face… This is where the “Ask an Asshole” series comes into play. I am here to let them know, in no uncertain terms what they should be hearing instead of the politically correct nonsense the majority of these columns these idiots write into for answers. I’ve usually found moronic columns in the “Miss Manners and “Dear Abby” columns, but I found something that needed my attention in a health advice column… I am no doctor, nor am employed in any capacity of the medical profession, but there are some things even an asshole like me can diagnose. Here is another piece in the “Ask an Asshole” series!

Wish Lists?

Well, it is the holiday season, so why not do a quick post about gift giving. Wish lists are something you expect from a child this time of year, Santa does need to know what the children want for Christmas for some reason even though he is supposed to be all knowing and all seeing... Too bad we were too stupid to figure that out when we were kids.

What I don't understand are these women on social media sites that create wish lists for people to send them the items on said list. Is this the modern day version of being a sugar daddy? This has sucker written all over it if you ask me. Do these idiots that buy these ladies actually think that they will get laid out of it? Oh, it's the picture the tramp posts (for the world to see... it's not personal), who is essentially a glorified stripper, in the lingerie that this fool bought for them that they get off too... Jacking off to a picture, that's almost getting laid right?

A job opportunity for locked-out NHL players...

Who says that I don't have a heart... I am offering a job opportunity to locked-out NHL players.

My "All Asshole" Fantasy Football Team

There are quite a few people in this country whose life revolves around football. These people should realize that it’s just a game and really not all that important in the grand scheme of things. The funny part is that football as we think of it is only relevant in the USA and is secondary to Futbol (soccer for the Neanderthals out there) in popularity between two sports with the same pronunciation worldwide. I always knew that the NFL was full of egotistical, self-centered assholes with a god complex, but as I started research for this piece, I began to feel as if I had bitten off more than I could chew with this project. There are more assholes than I had realized associated with this professional sports league. None the less, people will continue to worship the players of the NFL, a league that is marred with scumbags. Here are my selections of the biggest assholes that have been a part of the league, past and present. I tried to include a representative from every position. Feel free to leave comments and or assholes I may have missed or had to omit in the comment section below… I had to leave some assholes out; this blog would have become an epic novel had I included everyone!

Road rage exists for a reason...

It’s OK, you can admit it… There are times where you just want to scream obscenities at some fucking idiot while you are driving. It does not make you a bad person, it happens to all of us. There are plenty of things that can piss you off while driving, things like not using turn signals, tailgating, and dipshits merging into your lane without looking to see if another vehicle is there. Road rage came into existence for a reason, and that reason is, some people drive like assholes! For me, the driving experience at times can be as maddening as getting kicked in the balls, then going back for repeated shot to the nuts the next day, and again the day after that aaand the day after that, so on and so forth… It makes me wonder why I subject myself to such aggravation day in and day out. 

Welcome back, Asshole!

It's been awhile since I’ve written anything for the blog and since it is back to school season; it feels appropriate to catch up with all of you like the college coeds and fraternity douche bags, who are returning to campuses, talking about their summer transgressions and then promptly drinking themselves into comas and fucking random people in every frat house, sorority and bar.