A lesson Lisa Khoury learned the hard way...

I am not schooled in journalism. I did not even take a journalism class as an elective in my college courses, so I am not going to say that I am an expert on this particular field. I write opinion and or advice columns from time to time because it is a creative release for me. There is no right or wrong, it is my perspective on things in most cases. For as much as an asshole I can be, even I have boundaries and use common sense when it comes to the topics I discuss. I voice some strong opinions and have yet to receive any harsh backlash. Why is that? I tip toe the line and know that some areas are sensitive subjects amongst people. For example, ones race, I avoid the topic like the plague because it is easy for points to be misconstrued, taken out of context, twisted and basically come across horribly. Case and point, Lisa Khoury an assistant editor for The Spectrum, a student newspaper at the University of Buffalo, learned this lesson the hard way… a lesson that is priceless and possibly more valuable than anything that pricey tuition will cover. 

After reading Khoury’s article titled “Why put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari?” (1.), which came across as a feminist manifesto condemning women having tattoos in any way shape or form, I was in a typical state of uproar. This article focused on women, but the point could have easily shifted towards men. I am a man who has tattoos. They are covered when I am in business attire so I do not leave an unsavory opinion on the closed minded portion of society that still has stigma against people with a tattoo. 

In typical asshole form, I had plans on lambasting her article; unfortunately adult life gets in the way sometimes and does not allow you to do things on a moment’s notice. While biding my time until I could write, Khoury had put out a second article called “The day I met the internet” (2.), a response to the backlash people had to her opinion on tattoos. Upon seeing her follow up article, I decided to scrap my original piece and do something that touches on both articles which I am happy about, this will be a much better piece. My reply will not be a profane laden assault on the author as some of you may expect, this person is notably shaken by the response she received. She is a clueless and sheltered 19 year old, which is evident by her “I never meant to be vindictive toward an entire subculture” statement from the second article. She has a good deal to learn about life and I am taking this opportunity to become a professor for a few moments. I am not here to bash her on a personal level, from reading her rebuttal column, I see that many people have already chosen that route. I am here to give a few words of criticism intelligently.

I wrote a few thoughts down on paper knowing I was not going to be able to write for a few days. The original thoughts that come from emotion are so much better than anything I could come up with after simmering after a few days, which is why I take notes.  Here is a sample of those initial thoughts:

·         * She might as well have written a single word article that simply read “Nigger.” She offended anyone with a tattoo the way that derogatory racial slur offends African Americans. Insulting a whole demographic will bring harsh criticism.

* Her view is one that reminded me of the Occupy. After talking with them and disagreeing with their views, I was told that I was “uneducated and need to educate [myself].” No comprehension of others point of view. 

 * In elementary school, boys often picked on the girls they liked. Is the author envious of the girls with tattoos because she lacks the self-confidence to get one? As per her picture on the column, she is not exactly a beauty queen.

The most important point of my original thoughts could not be justified by just a bullet point in my opinion. It is a deeply personal point that draws up so many raw emotions. Sure, some people that get tattoos just for the sake of having them, for example the notorious 'tramp stamp.' Generally there is little or no meaning behind this type of tattoo, but for others with tattoos, this is not always the case. Some people have a deep connection with the ink that is placed upon their skin.

My first born son had passed away; he was stillborn so I have a very limited amount of memories because of that short time I had with him and I cherish each and every one of those moments. His death was a traumatic experience that had shaken me to the core. It changed me as a person. Tears are actually welling in my eyes as I write this. A tattoo is forever… My son and the time we shared together unfortunately were not. How did I choose to grieve and help keep him with me? I chose to get a memorial tattoo, a fairly sizable one. It is a half sleeve tattoo from my elbow to my wrist. Within that memorial I have an image of his actual footprints within the tattoo to ensure a part of him is always with me. That tattoo is so important and so profoundly meaningful to me; it is a part of me that is irreplaceable on so many levels. It is more important than you, Lisa, or anyone will ever be able to comprehend…  

For you, Lisa, to criticize a culture that you do not understand is irresponsible as a budding journalist. Your opinion was one sided and based without any knowledge on the topic. Have you ever bothered even asking anyone about their ink? It is amazing what you learn through conversation, you should try it sometime. Instead, here you are, shaken to the core by the harsh response to your words from a sect of the community that you insulted with your naivety. Here is a lesson from an asshole because I live and die on my opinion… if you are tough enough to dish it out controversial commentary, you better be tough enough to take the undoubted response and consequences that are sure to follow.

You also need to be prepared to understand logic from opponents. Maybe you should take a philosophy course that focuses on critical thinking and the process of constructing and diagramming of arguments. They exist, I have taken them… They will assist you in constructing arguments, which is vital when giving opinions. If you question that logic of what can be learned in a class like that, take me on in a battle of wits or get into a debate with me… I’ll guarantee you lose, and lose badly.

As I stated earlier, you are a clueless, naive, sheltered 19 year old, Lisa. You have a lot to learn about the world and life. Choose your words wisely if you want to continue to write opinion columns; you are a voice of one, your opponents will far outnumber you every time. You never know who you'll offend with what you say. Trust me… I am an asshole, I know this firsthand. If you don’t believe me, look up Jennifer Gish and her battle with Buffalo Bills Fans. It is a perfect example…

Links to Lisa Khoury’s articles mentioned in this blog entry:

1.       http://www.ubspectrum.com/opinion/why-put-a-bumper-sticker-on-a-ferrari-1.2755789#.Ty0ZYfmlP5M

2.       http://www.ubspectrum.com/opinion/the-day-i-met-the-internet-1.2764063#.Ty0a-vmlP5M